Losing a Life

In this thought-provoking memoir, Nancy Gerber maps the wrenching terrain of caring for an elderly parent. In the fall of 1995, at the age of 73, the author's father suffered a massive stroke on the right side of the brain, rendering him permanently disabled. This catastrophic event plunged the author and her family into a crisis for which they were completely unprepared, one that included financial worries; the need to hire full-time, live-in help; and the specter of putting her father into a nursing home. Even more wrenching was the demise of the parent she had always known. From an active, gregarious man with hobbies and friends - a man who had been working at the time of the stroke - her father became withdrawn, hostile, and silent. This profound loss was aggravated by the stress and anxiety that characterize family caregiving. In honest, evocative prose, the author describes her struggle to negotiate the competing demands of love, filial responsibility, familial conflict, and personal autonomy that arise when a parent becomes ill.