Girl, the Penguin, the Home-Schooling and the Gin

<font size =&quote;+1&quote;>The very possibly hopefully billion-copy-selling parody of the million-copy bestseller, The Boy, The Mole, The Fox and The Horse - for our times and for parents everywhere</font>'It's alright,' said the Penguin, in exactly the sort of way that Penguins don't. 'This is the only book you'll ever need to find complete happiness.'Because it's been a bit of a trying time, hasn't it? You now know that your five-year-old is better at maths than you. And English. And at not crying during work. And the only way to get through it with a smile has been to buy all the booze and try to remember how to do 'going out'. But don't worry, here to paper over all the cracks is a touching book, full of tender animal friends, pretty pictures and not too many words. A book for our times - to remind us of the precious joys of having all the family together, non-stop, twenty-four hours a day. Owning it will make you happy. Giving it to other people will make you seem kind. Reading it will remind you that you're nearly out of gin.